TTI After Dark: If Players Were Pop Stars

If you squint, Ana Ivanovic is basically Taylor Swift.

Both are tall, pretty people who reached the pinnacle of their careers before the age of 25.

Did I mention tall? #Twinsies.

Realizing this, the gang over at Outside the Ball, which describes itself as “a multi-sports television show that features exclusive interviews, music videos, sports entertainment, sports comedy show” has found a way to immortalize a relationship between the two forever on the Internet. On Sunday, the site published a parody music video of “Shake it Off,” Swift’s shoutout to “the h8tors,” featuring a certain Serbian WTA star.

It’s glorious. Behold.

With that earworm now swirling around in your brains, let’s take a look at some other famous pop songs that were (with some creative license) written for tennis players.

Artist: Jelena Jankovic

Sung to the tune of: Fergalicious – Fergie

“Fergalicious” was the second single from the former Black Eyed Peas front-woman’s 2006 solo effort, The Dutchess. It was an anthem of many a tween who thought they were pretty cool in the mid-2000s – myself included – and “Jajalicious” would be a perfect theme song for the former World No. 1. Who wouldn’t want to see Jankovic rap about being “a little bit conceited” and blowing kisses that have the boys “linin’ down the block” just to watch what she’s got? Jamie Murray would be first in line.

Judging by her Instagram handle, Jankovic herself is already on board with the idea.

Artist: Simona Halep

Sung to the tune of: Wake Up – Hilary Duff

“There’s people talking, they talk about me. They know my name, they think they know everything – but they don’t know anything about me!” If Halep isn’t the Hilary Duff of the WTA’s elite, then who is? Duff rose to stardom as a teen idol, and was lauded for her squeaky clean image and bright personality while her contemporaries played fast and loose with the rewards of pop stardom. While I’m not suggesting that any of Halep’s contemporaries are hard-partying, wild children (aside from the occasional post-Grand Slam bar crawl), the two share many similarities. Much like the French Open finalist, Duff wasn’t considered the brightest star of her generation of pop princesses, despite achieving massive commercial success.

“Wake Up” is Duff’s “Look at me, I can party too!” refrain. The Romanian is all business on court, but I bet you she throws some killer dance parties back home in Bucharest when she gets a chance to let her hair down. I’m told Monica Niculescu is the DJ.

Artist: Sloane Stephens

Sung to the tune of: Complicated – Avril Lavigne

Avril Lavigne spoke to the pseudo-angsty adolescents of the mid-2000s, the kids who felt like they didn’t fit in anywhere else. The Canadian’s biggest hit, entitled “Complicated,” is the perfect embodiment of all she brought to pop music. When the track was released in 2002, Lavigne said the song was about people who are fake. She said: “People sometimes bother me how they’re not real and how they’re just, like, putting on a face and being two-faced.” Lavigne croons about a boy who can’t decide who he wants to be, and Stephens certainly suffers from a similar predicament.

Stephens’ relationship with both fans and the media is, well, complicated. The American appears to have a happy-go-lucky personality off the court, but frequently appears aloof and disinterested in more formal settings. It’s like she, too, can’t decide what she wants to be. Pro tip, Sloane: acting like you’re somebody else gets Avril frustrated.

Artist: Radek Stepanek

Sung to the tune of: I’m a Freak – Enrique Iglesias (feat. Pitbull)

Need I say more?